Wednesday, May 26, 2010

BLOBFISH!!!




Okay, so I saw this today, and my immediate reaction was OMG WTF? Because that’s pretty much white Jell-O with eyes. Really. But apparently it’s a “Blobfish” (original right?) So here’s what it is:

 

“The Blobfish inhabits the deep waters off the coasts of Australia and Tasmania. Due to the inaccessibility of its habitat, humans rarely see it. Blobfish are found at depths where the pressure is several dozens of times higher than at sea level. To remain buoyant, the flesh of the Blobfish is primarily a gelatinous mass with a density slightly less than water; which allows the fish to float above the sea floor without expending energy on swimming. The relative lack of muscle is not a disadvantage as it primarily swallows edible matter that floats by in front it.” –Wikipedia

 

I have officially decided I want a Blobfish for Father’s day, and YES I am aware that I’m not a father, but STILL. It’s closer than my birthday. And I will be the only parent to that poor blobfish, so it’s kind of the same. And plus, I’m pretty sure that a blobfish is cheaper than a dirty diseased orphan or a puppy, and I am kind of strapped for cash.

 

Anyways I have to go buy a blobfish tank and blobfish litterbox, but here’s a last picture:

That’s right. I bought my blobfish a BOW. She’s to LOVE it. I've decided to name her Sheila, in  honor of her Australian heritage. But now I’m thinking, as an immigrant, she might feel excluded from other CANADIAN blobfishes, so her full name will be: Sheila Moose-Beaver Insert-My-Last-Name-Here-So-She-Feels-Like-Part-Of-The-Family-But-No-Way-Am-I-Gonna-Tell-You-Random-Readers-It-Over-The-Internet-What-Do-You-Think- I-am-Stupid?-Seriously-Guys-God!

 

Blobfish HEARTS, emberaelle

So, I've decided to start a BLOG

The other day, I was talking to my pet elf, Danae, and she mentioned that my, um, "verbal diarrhea" was  something like how funny bloggers spoke/ranted. And I thought, hey, why not? I mean, I can expel all my random words onto a blog, and it temporarily shuts me up until i think of some more random shit, PLUS nobody is obliged to read it. (except for you, Danae) But then I thought of all the time and effort it takes to write in a blog every day and I almost gave up. I mean, typing is a lot of exercise for your fingers. I could get carpal tunnel! Seriously, you may laugh, but I don't wanna have to wear one of those stupid wrist guards, and everyone will be all "Did you break your wrist?" and I'll have to explain, which would suck, because really, they'll tune out after the first twenty minutes of me giving them in-depth descriptions of exactly WHERE it hurts, so they'll just think I broke it anyways. It's a waste of my time, really. And YOU, dear reader probably think this is a waste of yours... So I'm going to peace out... (which really, why do people say PEACE out? I mean wouldn't you want to say WAR out? or CANCER out? or SKINNY JEANS ON BOYS out? don't you want the BAD things to go OUT? but anyways, i digress...)

MILEY CYRUS OUT,
emberaelle